Best Offer Wins by Marisa Kashino

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🏡 Best Offer Wins Review: Unhinged House Hunting at Its Finest ⭐⭐⭐⭐ (4 Stars)

If you’ve ever lost out on a house and thought “wow, I’d do anything to win the next one”…
Margo Miyake heard you and said: bet. 😅

⚠️ Trigger Warnings

  • Sexual assault (referenced)

  • Graphic violence

  • Murder

  • Infidelity

  • Death (including staged suicide)

  • Cursing

📚 About the Book

Best Offer Wins by Marisa Kashino is a darkly funny, satirical thriller that takes the nightmare of a competitive housing market and turns it into… well… a full-blown crime spree.

Think: real estate desperation + morally bankrupt ambition + a narrator who should absolutely not be trusted.

🚨 Spoiler Warning: FULL Plot + Ending Below

No skimming here—this is the whole chaotic ride.

🏠 Plot Summary (Spoilers Included!)

Margo and her husband Ian have been stuck in a tiny apartment for over a year and a half, getting crushed by DC’s brutal housing market. Cash offers, bidding wars—it’s a bloodbath. Ian is ready to give up.

Margo?
Absolutely not.

When their dream house pops up, she immediately goes into full main character manipulation mode.

👀 Phase 1: “Friendly Future Buyer”

She “accidentally” meets one of the homeowners, Jack, scopes out his life, and inserts herself into his orbit—literally joins his yoga class 🧘‍♀️. She even pretends she and Ian want to adopt just to bond with Jack and his husband Curtis, who adopted a child from China.

This leads to a painfully awkward dinner where Jack and Curtis realize:
👉 Oh… she’s not a friend. She’s a strategic infiltrator.

Plan fails. Ian is mortified.
Margo? Already onto Plan B.

🔍 Phase 2: Digging for Dirt

Margo starts investigating Curtis like she’s back in her journalism days. She uncovers:

  • Curtis plagiarized a student’s work

  • His wealthy father paid the student (Dottie) to stay quiet

Margo tracks Dottie down (!!), confirms everything, and decides:
👉 Blackmail is now on the table.

💔 Phase 3: Personal Life Implodes (But Make It Productive)

While all this is happening:

  • Margo finds out Ian is cheating 🙃

  • She gets pregnant 🤰

  • She decides… none of that matters as long as she gets the house

Honestly, the commitment to priorities here is… impressive? Terrifying? Both?

She blackmails Curtis anyway, and he agrees to help influence the sale—but not outright.

🔪 Phase 4: This Is Where Things Go Fully Off the Rails

The house goes on the market. Offers are coming in. Time is running out.

So Margo escalates. And when I say escalates, I mean:

👉 She manipulates her neighbor Natalie
👉 Gets her drunk
👉 Steals a wrench
👉 Murders Ian’s affair partner Alex
👉 Dumps Alex's body in Jack and Curtis's house
👉 Frames Natalie
👉 Then kills Natalie too

YES. ALL OF THAT. 😳

She stages everything so it looks like:

  • Natalie and Alex were romantically involved

  • Alex broke things off

  • Natalie snapped and killed her

  • Natalie dumped Alex's body in Curtis's house because she had envisioned living there with Alex

  • Natalie later died from the guilt (suicide/overdose implication)

Margo plants all the evidence.

🏡 Phase 5: And Somehow… She Wins???

The murder scandal scares off other buyers.
Offers disappear.

And guess who’s still standing?

Margo.

She and Ian buy the house. Move in. Bring Natalie’s dog (which, honestly, she treats better than humans 🐶).

Ian is horrified and emotionally wrecked—but stays.

Because:

  • Baby on the way

  • Life is now… irreversible

📱 Final Twist

Just when you think we’re done…

Margo finds a new burner phone in Ian’s bag.

Meaning:
👉 He’s still cheating
👉 He might know more than he’s saying
👉 This marriage is a ticking time bomb 💣

And THAT’S where it ends.

💭 My Thoughts

This book was:

  • Ridiculous 🤯

  • Unhinged

  • And somehow… incredibly fun to read

I absolutely flew through it because I had to see what Margo would do next. Every time you think she’s reached the limit, she just… keeps going.

What I loved:

  • Dark humor sprinkled throughout (I genuinely grinned at multiple parts)

  • A completely unlikeable main character who is still wildly compelling

  • The way it skewers real estate culture and obsession with “perfect lives”

What didn’t fully land:

  • You really have to suspend disbelief by the end

  • Margo is not redeemable… like, at all

But honestly? That’s part of the fun.

⭐ Final Rating: 4 Stars

Was it absurd? Yes.
Did I enjoy every second of the chaos? Also yes.

📖 If You Liked This, Try:

If nothing else, this book will make you feel way better about your own house-hunting experiences 😂

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