Life Is Hard Marriage Is Easy by Kerry Michael St. Martin
⭐ 5-Star Book Review: Life Is Hard: Marriage Is Easy by Kerry Michael St. Martin 💍
Amazon Affiliate Link: 📘 Grab your copy here!
🚨 Trigger Warnings
None — unless, of course, you’re triggered by common sense. 😉
🕊️ Spoiler Alert
This review discusses key lessons and chapter details from the book.
💡 First Impressions
First of all, what a fantastic title. We always hear people say “marriage is hard”, right? So when I saw Life Is Hard: Marriage Is Easy, I thought, Wait, what? You’ve got my attention, Mr. St. Martin.
And you know what? The book absolutely delivers. You start reading, nodding along, thinking, Well, yeah, that’s obvious… — and by the end you realize: Exactly! Marriage is easy when we stop overcomplicating it.
💬 What This Book Is Really About
This isn’t your typical sugar-coated marriage manual. Kerry Michael St. Martin goes straight for the myths and misunderstandings that mess up so many relationships. He dismantles the cultural noise — the movies, the social media soundbites, the half-baked advice — and gets back to what marriage was designed to be: a covenant built on truth, love, and purpose.
There’s nothing overly “earthshattering” in the sense of brand new ideas — it’s more like a giant “Oh right, I knew that… but I needed to hear it again.” Things like:
💬 Marriage should be built on truth.
💬 Listen to each other.
💬 Love is not lust.
💬 Partnership requires humility.
It’s basic wisdom, but presented in a way that makes you stop and actually apply it.
📖 Chapter 6: “The I vs. the We”
This is where the book really shines. 🙌
There are so many marriage books that list tips and communication hacks but never quite hit home. St. Martin, though? He digs deep. In Chapter 6, titled “The ‘I’ vs. the ‘We’”, he introduces what he calls the “Achilles Heel of Marriage” — 17 types of problem individuals that can destroy a relationship from the inside out.
And let me tell you, this list will make you pause and think. Here are the 17 types:
1️⃣ The know-it-all
2️⃣ The non-listener
3️⃣ The accuser and the hypocrite
4️⃣ The charmer and manipulator
5️⃣ The cheater
6️⃣ The liar
7️⃣ The abuser
8️⃣ The emotionally unintelligent
9️⃣ The user
🔟 The controller
1️⃣1️⃣ The indecisive
1️⃣2️⃣ The narcissist
1️⃣3️⃣ The complaint chaser
1️⃣4️⃣ The lazy one
1️⃣5️⃣ The spiritually undeveloped
1️⃣6️⃣ The image chaser
1️⃣7️⃣ The boss (vs. the true leader)
You know what’s wild? Every single one of these felt so real. I could think of at least one person (okay fine, sometimes it was me 😅) who fit a few of these categories.
✝️ The Antidotes: 7 Steps to Strengthen Your Marriage
After laying out the 17 “Achilles Heels,” St. Martin offers seven antidotes — practical, biblical mindsets that actually work. These are:
1️⃣ The righteous leader
2️⃣ The unselfish spouse
3️⃣ The encourager
4️⃣ The servant
5️⃣ High emotional intelligence
6️⃣ Good decision-making
7️⃣ The renewing of the mind
And the best part? He doesn’t just name them — he breaks down how to live them out. It’s simple, actionable, and feels doable, even for those of us who sometimes need a reminder to not be the “non-listener.”
💬 Final Thoughts
By the end of this book, I was convinced: marriage really can be easy — if we stop centering ourselves and start living with the heart of a servant.
There’s nothing gimmicky here. It’s real talk, written with warmth and wisdom. Life Is Hard: Marriage Is Easy is one of those books you’ll want to highlight, tab, and come back to often. I truly believe every couple — newlyweds or 30 years in — can find something life-changing in these pages.
⭐ 5 out of 5 stars. Highly, highly recommended.
📚 If You Liked This Book, You Might Also Enjoy:
💞 The Meaning of Marriage by Timothy Keller
🙏 Love & Respect by Emerson Eggerichs
💬 The 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman
❤️ Boundaries in Marriage by Henry Cloud & John Townsend
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