The Unhoneymooners by Christina Lauren

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🌺 Book Review: The Unhoneymooners by Christina Lauren

Laugh-out-loud, swoony, chaotic fake honeymoon excellence!

5 out of 5 stars? PLEASE. I’d give this book 10 stars, a trophy, and a fruit platter at a resort buffet.
Funny. Sweet. Unputdownable.
DO NOT READ IN PUBLIC unless you’re okay with snort-laughing out loud and alarming strangers. 💅😂

⚠️ Content & Trigger Warnings

While this book is overall light-hearted and romantic, it includes:

  • Workplace discrimination (based on marital status)

  • Infidelity

  • Sexual harassment (mild, one scene)

  • Verbal manipulation/gaslighting

  • Miscommunication

  • A serious case of “Why didn’t he believe her?!”

✈️ Quick Overview

Title: The Unhoneymooners
Author: Christina Lauren (aka romance queens Christina Hobbs & Lauren Billings)
Genre: Contemporary Romance / Rom-Com
Published: 2019
Tropes:
✔ Enemies to lovers
✔ Fake relationship
✔ One bed
✔ Sibling drama
✔ Vacation romance
✔ Public proposal
✔ Hilarious chaos
✔ He said, she said

⚠️ Spoiler Warning!

From this point forward, we’re diving straight into tropical spoilers, tangled relationships, and one VERY memorable paintball game.

🌴 Full Plot Summary (Because You’ll Want to Relive Every LOL)

Olive Torres is a self-described unlucky pessimist and the twin sister of ever-optimistic Ami, who’s just married Dane—Olive's least favorite human. To make it worse, Dane’s brother Ethan is also Olive’s nemesis. He’s smug. He’s judgy. And he totally side-eyed her dress.

Cue food poisoning. EVERYONE at the wedding falls ill from the seafood buffet... except Olive and Ethan. Ami convinces them to go on her all-expenses-paid honeymoon trip to Hawaii because, well, non-refundable. Free vacation? Even with a nemesis? Deal.

Oh, but there’s one bed.
Oh, and they have to pretend to be a couple.
Oh, and Olive’s new boss is at the resort.
Oh, and Ethan’s ex-girlfriend is ALSO there.
You see where this is going? Exactly. ✨ Delirious fake-dating bliss. ✨

They stumble through spa days, forced couple massages, boat mishaps (featuring a nearly-naked bathroom moment), paintball, tropical drinks, and awkward flirting. Somewhere between barbed banter and sunscreen reapplication, the walls come down.

Turns out? Ethan liked Olive from the beginning but was told she was “too negative” by none other than his snake of a brother, Dane.

They kiss. They vibe. They return to the mainland.

💥 Drama Returns Home

Back in Minnesota, things start crumbling:

  • Olive gets fired after admitting she’s not married (her boss is a buzzkill moralist).

  • Dane hits on Olive when Ethan’s not looking.

  • Olive tells the truth.

  • Ethan doesn’t believe her.

  • Ethan. Does. Not. Believe. Her.

Reader, I screamed. Olive walks away.

But then... 🫢💅

Ami (the GOAT twin) discovers Dane has been cheating. She pulls a reverse sting operation by inviting all his side chicks to their house while Ethan watches it all go down in real time. Iconic twin behavior.

💍 The Grand Finale (aka, All the Swoons)

Olive is working at a family restaurant when her old boss walks in (ew), but before she can spiral into a rage nap—Ethan appears, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, ready to grovel.

He confesses. He apologizes.
Her ENTIRE FAMILY is there (!!!)
They kiss, the restaurant cheers, and I burst into happy-reader tears.

Epilogue: Back in Hawaii, Olive proposes to Ethan (because of course she does 💅) and he pulls out the ring anyway.

🏖️ Final Thoughts: 5/5 🌟, Tiki Drinks, and Happy Tears

This book is:

  • Predictable? Yes.

  • Unrealistic? Sure.

  • ABSOLUTELY DELIGHTFUL? 100%.

I’ve already re-read it twice, and I’d do it again tomorrow. It’s one of those books that makes you feel giddy, seen, and hopeful.

If you need something that’s funny, romantic, and full of tropical escapism, run—don’t walk—to get The Unhoneymooners.

🛒 Ready to pack your fictional bags?

👉 Buy The Unhoneymooners by Christina Lauren on Amazon (Affiliate link – yes, I’ll spend the commission on tiki drinks.) 🍹✨

❤️ If You Loved This, Try These Christina Lauren Faves:

  • Love and Other Words – A second chance, soul-deep kind of romance.

  • The Soulmate Equation – Genetic matchmaking + grumpy cinnamon roll = perfection.

  • Josh and Hazel’s Guide to Not Dating – Unfiltered chaos and the purest friendship-to-love arc.

  • The True Love Experiment – A romance writer on a dating show. Need I say more?

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